"I'd get messages from men that would say things like, 'Do you want to meet up to have sex?
' And when I'd say no, they'd say, 'Oh, well you're fat, anyway.'" Craig says the criticism would bother her back then, before she'd started her successful fashion blog in 2013, found the body positivity movement, and started embracing her shape. While dating apps are notoriously scary spaces for women in general, with some 57% of female app users reporting some kind of harassment, plus-size women seem to have a tougher time than their "straight-sized" counterparts.
These changes point to an understanding on the part of app developers about how harassment affects some of its users, particularly those who are plus-size.
Instead they're the funny friend, or the helper, and they rarely find themselves in the center of romantic plot points.But at 34, she found herself newly divorced and facing a dating scene that she felt focused more on her looks than the one she'd remembered."I feel like the entire culture has changed so much," she says. Everyone is just judging based on appearance."That said, the idea that apps are to blame for people's obsession with their prospective partners' looks isn't completely fair.This may sound like pure optics, but apparently it's working: "Since we launched the pledge, we've seen decreases in harassment, both from reports and our machine-learning technology that detects harassing language," says Melissa Hobley, the chief marketing officer of Ok Cupid."We know that women in particular are really frustrated at how dating apps are set up to be incredibly focused on appearance.The reactions themselves are meant to be tongue-in-cheek ways to let a person know they're behaving like a jerk.The League, an "elite" dating app with a screening process that includes a review of your Linked In profile, recently rolled out Monochrome View, which makes the first photo on profiles black-and-white by default.Ok Cupid recently released a Membership Pledge, which takes aim at harassing behavior and messages.Before members are allowed to interact with the Ok Cupid community, they have to agree not to send any harassing, unwanted, or sexually explicit messages.So we spend a huge amount of time deliberating how we can make Ok Cupid better at highlighting your passions, your beliefs, and your interests.".Bumble publicly shamed a man who was sending lewd messages to women on the company's blog last summer.